In China, when you are living in the countryside, in a poor family, it’s hard for you to get some education. Most part of time, the family will save money for one child and this one will be able to study, to go to university, etc. Sometimes it can even be the whole village which saves money for one or two children expecting something in exchange when they will have a good job, earning a lot of money. Well and the interesting fact is that if you have several children in a family, even if the eldest is a girl, the family will send the boy to school and to high school and if possible to university later. And there is a simple reason for that; I quote my students’ explanation “when a girl is getting married she belongs to the husband’s family so there is no interest for the girl’s family to educate her”. According to them, it’s only in the poor parts of the country that things like that happen but I honestly think it’s an interesting way of thinking. Definitely not fair and quite selfish but still, it’s interesting. But once you are in a city, everybody goes to school according to them.
We talked about parity few days ago and it was really interesting, especially because the class I was observing had only 4 girls and 11 boys so the point of view was mainly masculine, I learnt a lot that day.
The international woman day exists in China as well and they respect it. During this day, women get reductions and they don’t work the afternoon (at least in companies) and kids make gifts at school for their mums (it’s like mother’s day in France I would say). BUT this day is only for women who are married, indeed when you are single or too young you are not concerned by this day, even if you definitely belong to the feminine part of humankind ^^ So it’s a really interesting thing, basically it means that as long as you are not married you are not a proper woman, can you believe it? That’s what they said and the girls in the class agreed with that, they were repeating “ we are not concerned by this day, not now, we are too young”. In fact they refused to take part at this day because it would mean they are old and they don’t want to be considered like old women.
The international woman day exists in China as well and they respect it. During this day, women get reductions and they don’t work the afternoon (at least in companies) and kids make gifts at school for their mums (it’s like mother’s day in France I would say). BUT this day is only for women who are married, indeed when you are single or too young you are not concerned by this day, even if you definitely belong to the feminine part of humankind ^^ So it’s a really interesting thing, basically it means that as long as you are not married you are not a proper woman, can you believe it? That’s what they said and the girls in the class agreed with that, they were repeating “ we are not concerned by this day, not now, we are too young”. In fact they refused to take part at this day because it would mean they are old and they don’t want to be considered like old women.
And you know what? The international woman day is the 8th of March, right? And in China, they are used to count from the year to the day so they say 03-08 ! And there is a Chinese expression which designates women and which means gossip, women who like to talk about everybody and who criticize everything and this expression is “3-8” in Chinese! So Chinese people think it’s a very good idea to have put international woman day at this date. ^^ Did you know something about that? I was very surprised to be honest and I think it’s quite funny!
Another fact ! Some Chinese companies prefer hire men instead of women when they want to have a very good productivity. Why? Because women are going to get married, to get pregnant and to raise their baby and so on they will need a rest, they will have “leaves” right? It’s a lot of leave and some companies don’t want to lose some productivity because people don’t come to work, even if it’s for good reason so they prefer to hire men!
Finally, in China, it’s really common to be married and to have a lover when you are a man and it’s not something people mind, at least not officially. Remember that here everything is about keeping his chin up and the face, in French we would say “you don’t want to lose the face” if it can help? Maybe it’s the same in English, I don’t know. Anyway, girls and boys talk about this “third person” normally without any problem. And they call it “little three” literally so if someone has a “little three” it means he/she has a lover. Just wanted to let you know that! And I am certainly not going to marry a Chinese guy ;) When we discussed about that with the students, boys were totally indifferent about this fact “yes the most part of time we do have a “little three”, and what? The wife still is the wife and the most important person in the family. They are clever enough to understand that”. In fact, when you marry someone it’s to please your family and to make your own family, everything is about family in China anyway so the wife still is the wife, the “chief” in the family, while the “little three” is nothing officially, and that’s why it’s common here. But actually what surprised me was one of the girl’s reactions, she said “you know, in geometry the most stable “figure” is the triangle”. This tells a lot about the culture I think, and once again it’s really interesting!! And you start to stand back on your principles when you are living in China, about your habits, why should we be right and they wrong? I thought a lot about this and I still think that 2 persons are enough J But at least they made me think, it was interesting to see their point of view.
Some Western companies still have a similar attitude towards women - I was reading an article only the other week which talked about women in the UK who were sacked after telling their boss that they were pregnant. It's kind of understandable from a purely business perspective but it's still very short-sighted and draconian!
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